What I do know

What I have learned the last few months.

1. Never leave home without a hat, gloves, jacket and your cell phone. If you don't you will be sorry.

2. When someone says it's " not that far" it sure as hell is " that far" its that and then some.

3. There is Jocelyn time and Alaskan Time. These two are never to be in sync.

4. There is a difference in City Moose and Country Moose. City Moose can read traffic signals, Country Moose cross the roads in 5 O' clock traffic and kill people. So much so there are signs on the highways warning you " High Moose Crossing Area Next 5 miles" .

5. My home is now considered the " lower 48" and that is NOT a term of endearment.

6. In order to keep sane you must have sunlight, friends and the Internet. Of which I only have one of right now, so I am pretty darn cranky.

7. I learned a new term BEATER WITH A HEATER, every home must have at least one that runs and one that doesn't and is sitting in the driveway under a tarp.

8. If you live in Wasilla you are accepting the fact that you live on Mars and you like it. To all my Oregon Peeps, I would say I live in Molalla, but a Hybrid Molalla/Woodburn with better stores.

9. This is not the place for Sissies, not sure why I am here but if you are one go home , your Mommy is waiting for you.

10. Do not and I mean DO NOT freak out about the prices of things here, it only annoys the locals. See # 9.

So hurry on up everyone and come visit me!